Musical Guest Patrick Cabreza

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This episode features my friend Pat Cabreza, newly of Long Beach. He and I talk inspiration, writing, hip hop, life – what else? Pat performs a few of his acapella freestyles and discusses his forthcoming mix tape release. Later I play a random beat and we improvise over it – the result is something to be heard… Check it out!

Duration: 30m.

 

You Don’t Know Yourself

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This is all about how the Me that I don’t know gave myself an idea.

Fevers are double-edged things. They defeat us mentally and they take their pound of flesh, but there’s a good side. One thing about them is that they force us to slow down. We can be little speedy idiots sometimes and we need to be reminded that our bodies are things to be taken care of, not plundered. In my case, I took some time out to make myself a stew, a little comfort food. I don’t take the time to do this much cause I’m too “busy”. In reality, I needed a little hand to to reach out and show me when to take a breather, to count my hens after they’ve hatched.

The other blessing of my fever is more immaterial. The thing is, I don’t have deep dreams that transport me to my subconscious. When I take nighttime cold medicine, however, I get these involved dreams that go for hours on hours. Within the dream-worlds time might go on for days and days. These hidden places are hidden because my waking, conscious brain sees little use for them. These places are populated with people and things and places I can’t conceive of in waking life. I do things I can’t imagine: I go see my favorite band as many times as I wish, I can be as happy as I want, I can make as much money as I desire. The beauty isn’t that I get to be about these places and things, the real blessing is that I get to know they’re there. I have these characters, with background stories all pre-heated, breathing and fighting and living inside my fucking head. Have they been dormant in there for years or for minutes, or did I “cook” them up instantaneously?

In writing a book, or a novella, or whatever, there is an anxiety about where the characters are coming from. Who are they? How much of them are just you in a new outfit? Are they thinly-veiled people from your own life? The answer is yes, and no.

‘Writing what you know’ can be terrifying. What if you don’t know enough, or the conflicts therein are too half-baked? Can this be reconciled? These are my anxieties. However, using the word ‘anxieties’ seems to give them too much teeth. I don’t fear them any longer  - so they aren’t real. Anxieties need some mystery to thrive and I’ve gotten rid of all that in this writing. 

The solution to them has already been presented. This writing is a reminder of the fact that, to borrow from an axiom, each of us contains a multitude. I’m not recommending that everyone immediately purchase a pack of acetaminophen tablets from the corner store. I’m saying that all of us are capable – even if we’re unaware of it every day of our lives.

Image Source: NASA, Astronomy Picture of the Day used without permission.

On Smartphone Superpowers and Selfish Behavior

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By the time I got a smart phone, most people had already grown accustomed to theirs. I call the first month the Honeymoon. Everywhere I went it was with me in my pocket, simultaneously increasing my texts-per-day and (allegedly) lowering my sperm count. Now, the Honeymoon is a memory but the magic lives on. Every morning I wake up to an alarm application that tracks my sleep cycle, which I can then post to social media. After my shower I refresh my podcasts and listen while making breakfast. I make calls and listen to music on the way to work. When I get lost I can use a real-time map (all the good it does me in Los Angeles traffic). If I’m out with friends and feeling bored, I have the option to dawdle on my phone and pretend that 3G is fast enough to justify my antisocial behavior. There’s even an application that fake-calls you so you can excuse yourself while dying a little inside.* My boorishness grows as surely as my attention span diminishes. My phone spends more time with me than any person does, or should. I’m not complaining.

The most interesting power of smart phones is perfunctory knowledge. I’m amazed by our new-found ability to settle any dispute in the middle of a conversation. People used to argue, uninformed, then disband perturbed. The astute one would seek a library, pore over a tome, then reconvene armed with their new smarts. Now we can just feel lucky on Google. There’s no longer any doubt about what the word ‘shibboleth’ means or what the capitol of Kazakhstan is. We just know. I’m not saying it’s better to be ignorant, just that it’s worth it to take a moment and observe our new superpowers. If the pen is mightier than the sword and knowledge is power then smart phones are the holy hand grenade.

When I got a smart phone I wasn’t aware of how much I could share with others; music, status updates, videos, and photos are all fair game. Uploading pictures became an impulse that I indulged often. I still do. The endless stream of personal content we wade through never breaks pace, informing us of the mundane as well as the profound (but mostly of cat photos). So I say: grant me the serenity to accept status updates I cannot change, the courage to change the things I tweet, and the wisdom to know the difference. There are many moments in life that make us stop and wonder at how lucky we are to have them. Be more selfish with these moments. Leave some of them just for you to have and hold. They’re yours to begin with.

*So I hear.